Whatsapp Share

The aftermath of the Brexit

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will not be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as “Euro-English”.

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of “k”. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

And Congratulations you have learnt German within minutes.

Alex

Recent Posts

Traders’ attitude to charity: global broker Octa’s research

KUALA LUMPUR, MALAYSIA - Media OutReach Newswire - 31 October 2024 - E-brokerage is a…

4 hours ago

Dusit Foods partners with Japanese food industry giant Green House to drive global expansion of Epicure Catering

Strategic alliance poised to create new growth avenues in Thailand, Japan, and beyond. BANGKOK, THAILAND…

7 hours ago

Leonteq Launches Shari’a-Compliant Offering on LYNQS

Leonteq announced today that it has enabled its Shari’a-compliant structured product offering on its digital…

7 hours ago

OZONO Launches in Australia with Innovative Eco-Friendly Cleaning Technology

Revolutionizing Home and Commercial Cleaning with Aqueous Ozone Solutions that are hypoallergenic & eco-friendly QUEENSLAND,…

9 hours ago

Use More to Get More with Citi This Travel Season

Enjoy up to 10% rebate and chance to win business class round trip to Tokyo…

9 hours ago

Indorama Ventures celebrates ‘Waste Fiction Challenge’ essay competition; inspires youth to champion zero-waste schools

BANGKOK, THAILAND - Media OutReach Newswire - 5 November 2024 - Indorama Ventures Public Company…

10 hours ago