Tips for Mumbaikar: Yeh hai Mumbai Meri Jaan….

1. If you are a real Mumbaikar and away from Mumbai, you get sentimental even if you hear words like Chembur; Dadar; Andheri, Bandra.

2. Mumbai – the only city where people no matter what language, religion and caste, express frustration by saying ‘chyayla’

3. The only place where even bus conductor motivates us “chalo aage badho”

4. For Mumbaikars – Burger bole toh bakwaas, vada pav bole toh jhakaas.

5. Mumbaikars – we will stand in empty trains and will fight for seat in crowded ones.

6. Mumbai – A city where people come to make their career and end up making their life.

7. A city with blend of different people and three things, ‘pudhil station’, ‘agla station’, and ‘next station’

8. Slow local trains – the one which halts at all stations

Fast trains – the one which halts in between stations.

9. Everything is fair in love, war and local trains.

10. You never say you are angry. You say “dimaag ka dahi ho gaya hai”

11. Mumbaikar to auto wala – sakinaka chaloge? Auto wala – nahi. Mumbaikar – saale dubai chalega?

12. Some words we use often – ghanta, waat lagayi, aai shapath, pandu, faadu, iski maa ka, party to banti hai, kat le, jhol, lai bhari, ek number.

13. Local trains are the only place in Mumbai where men are more civilized than women.

14. In India we drive on the left of the road. In Mumbai we drive on what is left of the road.

15. That awesome moment when in local trains you don’t have to move towards the exit, you are simply pushed towards it by the crowd.

16. While giving directions you say right / left maaro aur waahan pe ek bridge girega.

17. If Borivali passenger gets into a Virar fast train, that’s a serious crime boss.

18. Once you survive in a Mumbai local during journey from VT to Kalyan or vice versa during peak hours, you can survive anywhere in the world.

19. Train timings (9.27, 10.49 etc) are really important events of life.

20. In every local train journey you will find at least one person asking ” arey yeh platform kis taraf aayega?”

21. No salsa, hiphop, moon walk, B’boying or jazz can beat our visarjan dance.

22. No starbucks coffee can beat of our own cutting chai.

23. Nobody remains “untouched” once you enter Virar / Karjat fast local.

24. 99% fast train halt at Goregaon station, but still not indicated…

25. We dont understand “humko and tumko”. We prefer “tereko and mereko”

26. Second class ticket Rs 9 and first class ticket Rs 104. No difference. You can’t sit in either.

27. Getting a virar fast train from Andheri / Borivali during peak hours is more difficult than getting into IIT and IIM.

28. Aur yahan Mumbai mein ghadi sab ke pas hai, lekin time kisi ke pas nahi hai.